Power's P1 at Barber results in critical pun shortage

Will Power captured P1 for Sunday's IndyCar Grand Prix of Alabama at Barber Motorsports Park, resulting in a critical shortage of name-related puns at the National Strategic Pun Reserve.

Major I. P. Standing, PR officer for the Reserve, issued a statement to the press following the qualifying session assuring the public that "the nation's pun supply will be drawn from emergency reserve supplies until such time as the pun reserve can be rebuilt.

"We do not foresee a long-term supply issue, no," Standing said. "Our officers are working long and hard on the problem."

Shouts of "That's what she said!" were quickly muffled by quick-thinking Pun Reserve enforcement officers.

Power's success in the IZOD IndyCar Series has led to a massive increase in Pun Requests to the Reserve from the racing media. Headlines like "Penske Power play: Will takes St. Pete title" and "Will Power make it three in a row?" caused a rapid depletion of available wordplay resources.

However, Major Standing explains that the Pun Reserve is built to weather such storms. "We have planned for this contingency. We certainly have learned from other nations' histories about how to avoid critical shortfalls."

Standing is believed to be referring to a recent pun-related sanitary disaster in Vietnam masterminded by noted revolutionary Hu-Phlung Pu.

UPDATE: A statement from Captain Carl C. Culpepper of the Army Alliteration Deployment Depot "categorically denies that a similar shortage situation exists at our facility because of repeated references of the phrase 'Power's Peak Performance Pole Position Award.'"

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