HAIKU TUESDAY: Everyone needs a Barber but Trump edition
by Tony Johns on Apr 5, 2011 12:16 PM EDT
in Haiku Tuesday
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Watching Donald Trump sleaze his way through the Indy 500 pace car announcement, I couldn't help but think back to the days when I was a child and Davy Crockett was all the rage. I had a coonskin cap - as did many many other children of my ilk.
I recall that coonskin cap fondly, even though it made my head sweat, it smelled funny, and after a while it gave my scalp an itch that just would not go away. Plus, it tended to fall off at the slightest provocation - a stiff breeze, for instance. Let's just say that even though it wasn't attached to me, I was attached to it.
I have to feel that The Donald feels the same way about that ludicrous head carpet he wears, so my advice to him is to get some Space Shuttle ablative tile superglue and have that thing plastered onto his noggin before trying to drive a convertible Camaro at 100+ mph down the Indianapolis Motor Speedway frontstretch. It's physics, Donald.
Haikus following the jump...
Trump to drive pace car.
A better job for him, though?
"Engines... you are fired."
A convertible?
A recipe for failure.
The Airborne Toupee.
Hooray for Hinchtown!
At last he has his race seat.
Oh yes, Canada.
Tracy and Dragon.
PT back with a Penske.
Is Jay more patient?
And Bruno as well!
Racing at Indy for Foyt.
AJ's Team Brazil.
Scheckter and KV.
The mechanics will likely
Earn every penny.
Butler's bad finish
Took the wind out of our sails.
That's b-ball, baby.
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too disgusted to haiku
Trump is an embarrassing choice for this honor. I am very disappointed in IMS for associating the Speedway—on the 100th anniversary—with this man. Nice that they hop right in line with the pathetic Comedy Central Roast, Z-lister Gary Busey and the “birther movement.” What a great way to completely trivialize what should have been a very special occasion.
It’s Memorial Day weekend—would it have been too much to ask to put a veteran in that car? But then, not too many vets have a reality show on ABC…bad call.
by reddcarr on Apr 5, 2011 12:48 PM EDT reply actions 1 recs
Haikus 3, from DZ.
Beautiful Barber.
There’s just one Lap 1, Turn 1.
Drivers, PLEASE, be cool.
Carb Day bands listed.
After the Lights race, I’m out,
with iPod, to camp.
Don Trump for Pace Car?
The Centennial fizzled
Jeff Belskus, you’re fired.
Combover Haiku Blues, last minute edition
Trump is the Driver
“Under caution, I want you
To hit the pace car!”
Hey, the season starts
And there’s an off week? No more
Of this bull, Randy
Mailbox greets me
Bills and junk, but best of all
New Simona swag!
Not many Haikus
For an off week. No drama
Like Marco’s road rash
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