INDYCAR: Power Rankings (Sears Point)

Ironically, the rules governing the Power Rankings are only slightly less legit than the Indycar rulebook.

So, Brian Barnhart is invincible, there really are no rules, the Top-3 finishers ran there own race, Will Power hates someone, Danica is really gone this time and apparently testing for the 2012 IndyCar (and its on-track performance) remains NONE OF OUR BUSINESS.  All in all it's been a pretty typical week for IndyCar.  Nothing (good) to see here, so move along.

*smokes cigarette* Was it good for you, baby?

Okay, so TWO good things happened: Will Power is an internet star and a non-Penske/Ganassi car won...although that needed a week or so of confirmation.  Despite the New Hampshire outcome that was subject to change (but really wasn't) one thing is certain to NOT be a debacle: this week's Power Rankings.

 

THE GRID

(Wait, if I'm going to do a grid-rundown I need the proper theme music....right BBC?)

 

1.  Dario Franchitti

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Previous Ranking: #1 (no change)

It's never his fault.  So when does the crowd start booing him Danica Hater-style?

 

2.  Will Power

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Previous Ranking: #3 (+1)

Forever in our hearts and minds.

 

3.  Scott Dixon

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Previous Ranking:  #2 (-1)

Now if it was him who fired the double-barreled birds he'd gone to 2nd place in the rankings.  It wasn't, so he moves down a notch despite the 3rd (or was it 2nd?) place finish.

 

4.  Oriol Servia

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Previous Ranking:  #5 (+1)

If I were on a losing streak and so close to winning (and probably DID) like him I'd protest as well.

 

5.  Tony Kanaan

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Previous Ranking:  #4 (-1)

Why a port-o-john is that close to the track I've no idea.  I do know it won't be there again.  Maybe.

 

6.  Ryan Hunter-Reay

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Previous Ranking:  #7 (+1)

Probation.  It REALLY IS good for the soul.

 

7.  Marco Andretti

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Previous Ranking:  #6 (-1)

Scheckter'd.  Or was it Kannan'd?  Meh, BOTH.

 

8.  Ryan Briscoe

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Previous Ranking:  #8 (no change)

With each passing #HelioFAIL his job is looking more and more secure.

 

9.  Vitor Meira

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Previous Ranking:  #11 (+2)

I keep saying it…since they announced their partnership with Honda in 2012 SuperTex and his gang have become a revelation.  Coincidence?

 

10.  Danica Patrick

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Previous Ranking:  #13 (+3)

*grabs a bottle of tequila*  Yes he said tequila.  I think.

 

11.  Graham Rahal

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Previous Ranking:  #9 (-2)

Like Dario and Danica he never takes blame for anything…but the past month it really hasn't been his fault.  Mostly.

 

12.  Alex Tagliani

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Previous Ranking:  #10 (-2)

Part of his probation is to have an incinerary explosive attached to the oil pan to go off (like everything else) at Barnhart's discretion.

 

13.  Takuma Sato

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Previous Ranking:  #14 (+1)

Finally, he hits the right car…ironically it really wasn't his fault this time.

 

14.  James Hinchcliffe

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Previous Ranking:   unranked

It's been feast or famine for him.  If he can just keep his nose clean the Rookie of the Year title could be his since Viso keeps hitting JR.

 

15.  Simona De Silvestro

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Previous Ranking: #15 (no change)

Settle down everybody.  We'll be fine(Whoa.  I just put a hot-link to my own blog in a blog I write for!  FREAKING META!)

 

DNQ (Bumped from the field)

 

JR Hildebrand

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Previous Ranking:  #12

Panther Racing again gets Viso-ed…hey, their words and not mine.

 

Helio Castroneves

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Previous Ranking:  unranked

Is he WANTING to be out at Penske?

 

Charlie Kimball

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Previous Ranking:  unranked

It looks as though Ganassi Racing have taken the training wheels off.  Where has this been all year?

 

Mike Conway

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Previous Ranking:  unranked

Long Beach seems like a long, long time ago.

 

EJ Viso

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Previous Ranking:  unranked

Indycar's "Deebo"...and he knocked JR the fugg out.  AGAIN.

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