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The Paddock Pulse: February 8 Edition

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Paddock Pulse Splash
Paddock Pulse Splash

So yesterday was Pressdog's and Charles Dickens' birthday. That's some pretty RARIFIED AIR in terms of writing talent right there. I'm a little sad that the Pulse rolls the day after such a special literary day, but hey, you have to give the masters their due.

Then again, you have all of those readers out there who spent yesterday DRINKING, ye BASTARDS in celebration of The Great Day, so it's probably best that they're perusing the Pulse links today when they're sober (although I can't speak to whether IndyCar blog posts are a solid hangover remedy).

Click the jump for the Festival of Post-Pressdog-Day chickenscratching...

Frenetic Friday -- Near-Cancun Experience Edition [15 Days in May]
Mike wrote this just prior to getting on a plane to Cancun. Having lived near Cancun for a few months when I was just out of college, I can tell you it's tough to focus on blogging when you're eagerly anticipating a couple of days of the MAJOR HERSHEYS thanks to the water and nuclear burritos available from the Mexican Riviera. SALUD!

Finally… Looking forward to the 2012 Season [anotherindycarblog]
I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say that Eric thought of calling the DW12 "the deformed offspring" of a number of budgetary and political forces BEFORE he got a glimpse of the new F1 cars. Either that, or Eric is a platypus and thinks the new Force India car looks distressingly normal.

A Personal Appeal from Indycar Uberfans [Ground(ed) Effects]
This blog from DZ has the rather astounding distinction of being the shortest appeal from an IndyCar uberfan ever written. Even more incredible is that the two-word appeal does not contain a four-letter advernounjective that seems to be paired with "!" quite a bit by disgruntled Internet commenters.

INDYCAR Inspires [IndyCar Advocate]
I did not know before I read this article that INDYCAR has a "bright, unconquerable, immortal, unquenchable soul." If Zach is talking about Arni Sribhen, I'll wholeheartedly agree with this - although I must confess that the "unquenchable" part might refer to Arni's zest for Chick-Fil-A waffle fries, which Arni can consume at velocities approaching the speed of light.

All right, Mr. Bernard, I’m ready for my close-up [New Track Record]
This week, Mark metaphorically links IndyCar racing and film noir via the classic Sunset Boulevard. It's a great comparison, but the one thing he leaves out is WHO THE HELL PLAYS THE ROLE OF MAX?? Considering the weird accent Max has and his constant enabling of a certified loonball, I'd guess it'd have to be Randy Bernard (with Robin Miller as Norma Desmond). Get on that, IMS Productions!

The Glass Is Half-Full [Oilpressure]
...OF BILE AND PUTRESCENCE!!! -- oh, sorry, old habits are hard to break.

Paul Tracy Prepares For His Final IndyCar Season [Open Wheel America]
Amazingly enough, this blog does not mention once PT's apparent new side gig of acting as a Pithy Sayings Twitter bot.

Time to Step it Up, IMS []
If you have a great idea for attracting more people to Indianapolis for the Indy 500, post it in the comments section here. Sadly, my idea for making the World's Longest Slip-'n'-Slide in the IMS infield was shot down (maybe I shouldn't have specified that being naked, or using Jell-O instead of water, were requirements).

As the Firestone Turns: Meet Monica Hilton []
Someday it will be revealed that Monica, the erstwhile The_Race_gIRL blogger made good as a legit IndyCar personality, is the one pulling all the strings in the sport. It won't surprise me a bit, especially given that she is smart enough to have made a Dallara IR03 into a worldwide Twitter celebrity.

IndyCar/Indy 500 Book Recommendations [Through the Turbulence]
I swear, if any of you buy these books for bathroom reading, I'm going to track you down and pummel you with a plunger. A USED ONE.

Ten Questions With the Other Left Lobe of Motorsports [WideOpenWheel]
I AM NEFARIOUS! Woo hoo! (*checks achievement off of bucket list*) The sad part is that Brian Simpson only knows me by my Twitter account. Come to think of it, most people in IndyCar only know me by my Twitter account. It's their fault, though, for not being decent enough to move the entire sport lock, stock, and barrel to within easy walking distance of my house. LAGGARDS!

Driver Tweet of the Week

@h3lio: Just found out got my cell phone hacked again! C'mon!!

Last But Not Least

Hey, I'm not square, you're the one that's square.